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Social Anxiety
- Laura is in 3rd period algebra, and when the teacher asks her to explain to the class how she solved the homework problem, her heart starts racing, her cheeks turn bright red, and she feels like she’s going to faint.
- Marie is sitting in a lunch meeting at work, hungry but not eating her sandwich, because she’s afraid that her colleagues will hear her chewing and might think negatively of her.
- Andy wants to go to prom with the girl he’s had a crush on forever, but the thought of asking her out and actually going on a date is so terrifying that it makes him feel shaky and sick to his stomach.
Do you experience similar struggles to the people described in these scenarios? Have you felt similarly intense anxiety and fear in social situations? If so, you’re not alone. There are plenty of others out there who are suffering from social anxiety, too.
Social anxiety is one of the most prevalent psychological concerns in today’s world; yet, unfortunately, it is often misunderstood and not taken seriously. This makes it an even bigger problem for those who suffer from social anxiety. It is difficult enough to gather the courage to seek help, and it is quite discouraging when others discount your concerns. Even though you may have been told that you’re exaggerating and being irrational, it doesn’t make your anxiety troubles any less valid. They are real to you, and they are no small concern.
Social anxiety can be extremely damaging to sufferers’ lives – it can affect friendships, romantic relationships, self-esteem, productivity at work, and many other domains. But it doesn’t have to go untreated forever.
Symptoms of Social Anxiety: Checklist
Though a formal diagnosis requires a consultation with a mental health professional, you can get a general idea of whether or not you might be suffering from social anxiety by taking a look at this checklist. Symptoms may vary from person to person, but here are some common ones:
Fear of public speaking
Fear of speaking with strangers
Worry about others watching and judging you
Fear of embarrassing oneself in public
Fear of going out on dates
Distress while meeting/speaking with people in authority
Fear of eating in front of other people
Fear of giving one’s opinion in class or at a work meeting
Trouble making eye contact
Also, people who suffer from social anxiety have different bodily reactions to these stressful situations. For instance, you may experience:
Nausea
Quick heart rate
Shakiness
Dizziness
Sweating
Stomach-ache
Blushing
Dry mouth
(Please note: These surveys are not scientific. They are only an informational guide.)
Reducing Feelings of Anxiety
One of the most frustrating aspects of having social anxiety is that you probably know that many of your fears are unfounded, but knowing is a very different thing from feeling. It is exasperating to be in a situation that you logically understand shouldn’t be causing you intense fear, yet still find yourself unable to calm your racing heart, sweaty palms, and blushing cheeks.
There are various ways you can try to reduce your anxiety on your own. Though these may not be effective for everyone, here are some suggestions:
- Notice when you are being too critical of yourself, and make an effort to switch your thoughts around (“I am judging myself more harshly than I’d judge others, I must stop being so critical of myself.”)
- Try to interact in small social circles, with one or two other people at first, in order to gain confidence in your conversation skills with minimal pressure. Slowly build up to bigger group situations once you begin to feel more comfortable.
- Practice speaking in front of a mirror, making an effort to smile and stay relaxed. This may help you remain calm when you are speaking in front of others, because you’ve already rehearsed in an anxiety-free setting.
Seeking Professional Treatment
While these techniques are a good start, it is advisable for people suffering from social anxiety to also seek psychotherapy from a qualified mental health specialist. Such therapists are trained in different methods, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy and EMDR, which can be effective in reducing the intensity of your anxiety. These methods can teach you ways to physically relax your body during fearful situations, shift your thought patterns, and resolve previous issues that may have triggered your social troubles. Your therapist can help you develop the happier, more carefree life that you want and deserve.
If you would like to speak with a qualified psychotherapist, you can contact Mark Dworkin LCSW at (516) 731-7611.
